TSLP Season 4- The Burden of Leadership

🎙️ New Episode | The Burden of Leadership with Dr. Jacqueline Campbell

Leadership is often celebrated for its influence and impact—but behind the responsibility, many leaders quietly carry pressure, emotional weight, and expectations few people fully understand.

In this meaningful episode of the Transformation Station Leadership Podcast, I’m joined by Dr. Jacqueline Campbell for an honest conversation about The Burden of Leadership. Together, we explore the emotional, mental, and relational realities leaders face while carrying vision, making difficult decisions, and supporting others under pressure.

Dr. Campbell shares powerful insight on how leaders can navigate responsibility without losing themselves, why self-awareness and support systems matter, and how to lead with resilience, clarity, and sustainability.

Learn more about Dr. Campbell:
Website: https://drjacquelinecampbell.com
LinkedIn:   / dr-jacqueline-campbell-nd-lpc-s 
YouTube:    / @drjacquelinecampbell 
Facebook:   / visionexpansio 

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:01

Leadership often looks so strong on the outside, but on the inside, come on, you and I know it can feel heavy. The pressure to perform, decide, carry responsibility, and sometimes others can quietly become a burden. The question today is not whether we as leaders feel the weight, it's how we are able to stay grounded while carrying it. Come on, I'm excited for this conversation. Let's get started. We're talking about the burden of leadership. And we're gonna dive deep into how to stay grounded when everything is on our shoulders. I can't wait to have this conversation because today I have an amazing guest. I have Dr. Campbell. Dr. Campbell, I can tell you as you prepare, she is a leader, a woman who understands the emotional, mental, and strategic weight that leadership carries. Let me tell you a little bit more about her. Dr. Jacqueline Campbell is a conscious leadership strategist, author, and global keynote speaker who helps visionaries create greater freedom, fulfillment, and impact by teaching them how to harness the power of their nervous system. Dr. Jacqueline Campbell, welcome to Transformation Station Leadership Podcast.

SPEAKER_01 1:57

Hey Adrian, thank you so much for having me. I appreciate you giving me the time.

SPEAKER_00 2:01

Absolutely. So, so Dr. Campbell, listen, as I was preparing for this, I was thinking to myself that leadership responsibility so many times can feel isolated. Um sometimes the higher that we as leaders rise, the more we are expected to hold. And if we're not intentional with grounding, that pressure can lead to so many things that does not work for us. So I want to start out by asking you this question. How can leaders stay grounded when everything feels overwhelming?

SPEAKER_01 2:37

Well, Adrian, that's a really good question because the first question I would say for you to ask yourself is are you putting more on yourself? Or is somebody or something else putting more on you? Because that weight that we carry, sometimes it's not the wider world putting that on your shoulders. It's you taking it. And so practicing things like responsibility avoidance, asking for help, knowing when you need support, all that comes from awareness. So it actually comes a whole lot sooner before that huge weight, like trying to pay attention as it's building, knowing yourself is the most important thing. But when it, whenever you do have that weight, uh a way to really ground is actually to be by yourself. But a lot of leaders, when they feel that weight and they are isolated, they feel like that the, you know, the pressure is too high at the top, it's lonely at the top. Those things start to kind of ramble in our brain. So then they start drowning that noise out instead of sitting with it. We're running from ourselves, we're actually tuning out that internal narrative, which it gives us guidance, it gives us clarity, it helps us resolve all kinds of problems that are still in our nervous system, like traumas, attachment issues, lack of self-awareness. It starts to show us that. So when we're constantly trying to ground but shut that voice up, it doesn't work. We have to listen to the voice, accept it. Sometimes it brings up emotions. We need to feel those and then ground. But we can't bring our problems away and we can't run from them.

SPEAKER_00 4:19

I love that. I love that here in Transformation Station. We invite our listeners and our viewers to stop, really hear what our guests are saying. And so, right now, this is the perfect place for us to do that because you know, you mentioned a word a few times that I think is pivotal, grounded. Yeah, stop, kind of push out the noise. I saw this leadership principle that um really to me aligns with what you're saying. Grounded leaders create clarity where others feel overwhelmed. And you know, as you listen to Dr. Campbell, you're sitting here right now. If you're feeling overwhelmed as a leader, Dr. Campbell is reminding us right now stop, pause, become aware, create clarity so that you can be able to do things like reflect, right? And prioritize. You know, Dr. Dr. Jackie, what are the biggest risks when leaders carry too much?

SPEAKER_01 5:14

Oh, wow, that depends on how much um how many people and what depends on you being able to have your clarity. Because when you make a mistake because you don't have clarity, then it's going to impact everything around you and everyone. So if you're making a decision but you don't have clarity, you've actually made a misaligned decision, you've hurt somebody, you've caused a problem, and then it mounts up. But when when we get into those situations, we then end up blaming ourselves. So then we have fear and shame, which closes up our brain, which then creates lack of clarity even more. And it's like one problem that's now compounded with another problem because we didn't have clarity at the beginning. So the biggest thing that we need to understand is how to know when we don't have clarity, which again comes back to self-awareness.

SPEAKER_00 6:12

Take us a little bit deeper. Let's let's let's park it right here for a moment. Take us a little bit deeper on this.

SPEAKER_01 6:19

When let's say you're dealing with an issue, right? And things get hard, you have awareness, you start feeling the pressure in your chest, you maybe start feeling tension in your head, or a lot of leaders, they actually feel it right here in their shoulders. That is actually like that, that's saying you're carrying too much, that actually comes from the body's awareness.

unknown 6:42

Wow.

SPEAKER_01 6:43

It's like you have a pack on and it's huge and it's heavy. So when you drop that pack, everybody who expected you to carry that, and then you who expected you to be capable of carrying that, see, like you've dropped your pack, but you weren't capable sometimes, you weren't capable of holding that in the first place.

SPEAKER_00 7:03

I love that. Leaders, as Jackie was talking to us about some of the symptoms, which ones do you find yourself wrestling with or being impacted by that lets you know that you are carrying too much? So I'm gonna invite you right now to go ahead and put it in the chat in the comment section. Show us, tell us what are some of the signs of symptoms that lets you know that you are carrying too much. You know, when you were talking, I'm one of those shoulder people, I can I can instantly tell, even if I'm trying to hold it all together, my shoulders right up at the top, you know, and I'm like, oh, and I have you heard of the book The Body Keeps the Score?

SPEAKER_01 7:44

Absolutely, I'm a fan, it's no lie. Massage, they know it.

SPEAKER_00 7:50

Yeah, yeah, there were so many times where I've gone to get a massage and they're like, Oh, oh, don't even tell us what you do. Like this is you're you're carrying a lot right there. So let me ask you this question how can leaders stay grounded when um uh how can leaders stay grounded? Sorry, yeah, I lost here one second. How can leaders stay grounded when everything is overwhelming? Well, we've been we've been talking about that right here. How can leaders balance performance expectations with personal well-being? Right, this is uh tricky sometimes.

SPEAKER_01 8:25

It is because sometimes you don't have awareness until it's too late, right? So we can harp on awareness all we want, but at the end of the day, if you start today, then start paying attention to your body, that's starting that that muscle of awareness, it starts at building. But in the moment, excuse me, I got something in my throat. So, one thing for them to know is if you try to move forward without the clarity when the tension rises, then you're you're going to make the mistake. So then stop, pause, say out loud to whoever you're talking to, sometimes even yourself, that okay, I don't have clarity right now. I don't know what it is that I don't have clarity on, and that's okay, right? Sometimes coaching yourself through it encourages you to take a step back, close your eyes, go into your body, and do a few slow deep breaths in and out of your nose. What this does is it activates your parasympathetic nervous system, which is our rest and digest state, and encourages more oxygen and blood to actually go back into our ligaments instead of all into our chest. That's pounding our heart, which then limits the oxygen and brain, uh, oxygen and blood getting to our brain. So think about it like if you you start getting stressed and things are chaotic and you're frustrated, and then you want to make a decision, your brain doesn't have oxygen, and it can't have blood if it doesn't have oxygen. So you're actually limiting your own physiological capacity because you won't be patient in making that decision. Stop, close your eyes, take several slow deep breaths, activate that parasympathetic nervous system. And then what happens is our brain actually opens up a little bit. Neuroplasticity, because it's not caved in and kind of pressured, it opens and it flows literally. You can even visualize sometimes it helps to drop that pack and say, I'm gonna do a whole lot better without the weight crushing me, right? So stand up straight. And then after you've taken those slow deep breaths and your body has physically released a little bit of tension and your mind has opened just a little bit, you'll actually sense there's less pressure, maybe even a slight tingling. That's a good thing. Okay. So as we open that up, then think okay, what is the best solution? But don't answer it. Wait for the solution to come to you. Your brain pays attention to everything, it is so much smarter than you, right? So even intuitively, it will find the neural network because everything is connected and it can find the seamless route that you didn't even know was back. It was probably back in a different neural network that you didn't even know, kind of like you're digging through files in your brain, but everything's sprawn around, like it's sprawled out. Well, when you calm and you're like, okay, well, what's the best direction? And then you get an insight when you follow those breadcrumbs because your nervous system is paying attention to every single thing every second of the day, you're following your intuition. That's letting the system, which is your nervous system, guide you instead of sometimes your own stress.

SPEAKER_00 11:45

I love it. Can you guide us through um a technique that maybe we could use?

SPEAKER_01 11:52

Yeah, so visualization is huge. And I'll just kind of go off of what we already discussed. So once you close your eyes and you go into your body, scan your body from head to toe, and then visualize whatever tension you might be physically holding a pack or something, or you might feel a caving in your chest. Visualize that coming off, right? Whatever that is, and actually say to yourself, just release it. Like I don't have to figure out the problem right now. Just it's kind of like you're talking to your body, and visualization is a really good trick. I call them brain tricks because your brain is just a programming system, it will believe anything bad and it will also believe things that are good once it's decompressed the sensation. But if you're trying to tell it to calm down when it's full of stress, it's not gonna work. Then encourage it to release. And then after that, I would visualize white. Usually white is like a lighter feeling, and you're trying to visualize your body filling up with white light. And it doesn't matter. Like people say, okay, well, that might be woo-woo, who cares? If it works, your brain believes it. Use it, and then you'll see once you visualize it coming down through your toes and coming through your fingers and going up and filling your brain, how much lighter it makes you feel. That could take maybe two minutes. And that might save you thousands and sometimes even millions of dollars on a good decision. But if you make a bad decision, yeah, absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 13:27

And leaders, listen, Jaggie just gave us a technique that you literally could do at your desk. You can do in the workspace, you have that pressure-filled moment, you're know that you are right on the edge, just stop, close your eyes, focus, breathe, and decide to take that heaviness off. I love the fact that you said literally in two minutes, this could someone could do this and alleviate that pressure, right? And to help themselves to make a good decision.

unknown 13:55

Go ahead.

SPEAKER_01 13:56

You know what might help too, because business owners, they high performers, they always want to get things done fast, right? So they sometimes they rush through these exercises. If you actually set your timer, like let's say you're going into a meeting, it's important, you want to be your best self, set your timer for two minutes, then do it so you're taking your time. And don't finish it before the timer.

SPEAKER_00 14:18

Accountability. I love that. So let me ask you this question. I'm gonna go back a little bit. How does emotional regulation impact leadership under pressure?

SPEAKER_01 14:29

Oh, wow. So this goes into the serious conversation. Um, if and if you're a leader and you're listening to this, really, really pay attention to this part. Our brain is a programming system, like I was talking about a few seconds ago. And if you have past hurts, past traumas, past attachment wounds, past business failures. And one of the things that I noticed with people who are leading other people, when they've failed people, they become a trauma. That becomes such a hurt for you, it gets stuck in your brain. Those, the file cabinets and those neural networks, they are not organized. If you haven't dove into it, organized it, released the emotions that are stuck in your body, organize the information so that it's a coherent narrative in the brain. It gets jumbled. Let's say you get stressed out. Now you have fear of failure that's now been triggered. The emotions in the body increase. So now you're feeling the pressure from the current situation, and then the unresolved pressure from the past situation. And now you have multiple neural networks open and chaotic, and you're trying to make that decision. So this is why people get hurt. It's not because you make a bad decision, it's because you're stuck in negative spirals that are consistently making those bad decisions and you can't stop. And sometimes, most of the time, we can't even see. That's why because we can't see it, which actually limits our awareness even more because there's so much that's disorganized in the nervous system. We actually have defense mechanisms keeping us from seeing it because it prevents us from feeling the full emotion. Scared to feel the emotion. So our system actually ends up working against us while we're trying to make positive emotions during high levels of stress, but we have our unresolved, let's say, fear of failure, because that's the most common one, that it's actually limiting our awareness and it's causing problems.

SPEAKER_00 16:33

Tell us a little bit more about fear, fear of failure, right? I've seen um, I love acronyms. And for fear, there's two acronyms that I love. One says uh face everything and rise.

SPEAKER_02 16:45

Ooh, I like that.

SPEAKER_00 16:47

And the other one says false evidence appearing real. Leaders, you are 1000% correct. That, you know, this is one of the main tensions that we face as a leader. What are my people going to think? Am I competent enough? How do I show up even while I'm still learning? Oh, I made a bad decision today. Are they gonna hold it against me? How do I show my face? I feel ashamed and embarrassed, or what if we don't make the mission? You know, talk to us about this fear of failure.

SPEAKER_01 17:18

Well, you I love your two acronyms. They're great, and they're so real because they totally call out what fear does to us. It's completely fake, and you have to take accountability, you have to face it. But there's two emotions that when they surface in the body, our system, our nervous system, like that, it will shut it off. So our awareness goes out the window and we can't see clearly, and our body gets flooded. So we we build all kinds of defense mechanisms away from that, so we don't have to feel it. But if you can't feel it, you can't see it, which means you can't heal it. We end up running your life. Say that again, please. Oh, which part that was if you feel if you can't feel it, and and I don't mean feel it like you you felt the tension, right? I mean like sit in it. If you can't feel it, you can't see it, which means you can't heal it.

SPEAKER_00 18:18

I'm gonna have to write that one down like that. That's that's uh I'm gonna have to go back and watch the replay. That was good right there.

SPEAKER_01 18:23

And and what you said with your second acronym was that it's a lie. So this creates our reality. There's a part of our brain, it's called the thalamus, and it filters all of our senses, right? But the thalamus gets distorted, so you're actually seeing things that we think are real, but they're coded in all our unresolved issues. So when you get triggered, your thalamus is thwarted. It's like you just put on purple sunglasses and you think you're seeing the color blue.

SPEAKER_00 18:58

You're not this is the masterclass right here. I'm just like all tintos, all tintos, right? My goodness gracious. You know, I'm thinking leaders who can't control their emotion, sorry, leaders who can control their emotions, strengthen their influence, right? We look at influence in the workplace. I know for me, the leaders that I am that I admire the most are the ones who in the midst of pressure, they're giving off a confidence, a confident calm, a calm confidence. There we go, a calm confidence. They're not they're not faking to be perfect, but they are allowing themselves to be grounded.

SPEAKER_01 19:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 19:45

And leaders, you know, if you have a tendency to fly off the hands of curse people out, you know, keep that energy in in your workspace highly charged, you know, you will not leave a positive lasting impression, nor are you really teaching your people how to lead in a healthy manner.

SPEAKER_02 20:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 20:11

So, Doc, what mindset helps leaders carry responsibility without becoming overwhelmed?

SPEAKER_01 20:20

Um, I love that question too, because it's the mindset that makes or breaks it, right? Um, somebody, you know, about a year ago or so, they used the example of toxic optimism. And I like that is a perfect example. Because if you expect everything to go well or you're dismissing problems because you're like, oh, it'll be fun, it'll be fine, you're still running from emotion. Emotion is genuine and it's authentic. And so the mindset that I would say that assists the most is when you are authentic. So when you feel the pressure and the tension, and when you don't know, because sometimes you just don't know, right? Don't act like you have it all together. Say it out loud, but also be confident that I might, let's say I'll get stressed, right? And I can't make a clear decision. I can tell my my team who's depending on me to come up with the decision, and I'll say, you know, I'm I'm getting a little overwhelmed. I don't have clarity. Give me 24 hours, let me ground and get my thoughts together, and then I'll come back with a solution. You know, that is way more effective than saying, no, no, no, I got it, and then just make a decision and move forward, or you're probably gonna make mistakes, or completely cave, because also feeling your emotions too much. You might just need to be able to, or you might just need to coach yourself and say, okay, we'll figure it out because it's not all me. We will figure it out, but I need to ground right now. What you're also doing is you're using modeled behavior so you can teach your team, they don't have to act like they have it all. Together either. They're human.

SPEAKER_00 22:02

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_01 22:03

When they have problems, they'll say it instead of acting like they have it all together. So then eventually, when their numbers go down or they can't hold it together, or they end up silent quitting, or they're constantly sick, they're running away because they can't be authentic because they have to act like they have it all together so they don't get fired.

SPEAKER_00 22:22

And many people will crash and burn a lot quicker when they're trying to be perfect, right? That perfection factor. Here in Trust Imagy Station, we're always talking about community and encouraging our leaders to develop a culture that is healthy within their workplace. And so as you hear Dr. Jackie talking with us today, you know, she's talking about mindset that helps us to be able to carry our responsibilities well. I want to know what's resonating with you right now. Go ahead and tell us in the chat. Share one of your leadership journeys with us, even at this moment. So, you know, Doc, as we turn the conversation, as we turn the corner on this conversation here today, and this has been like a masterclass for real. So we're absolutely going to have to have you come back. I want to ask you, talk to us, because we want to walk away from here with some more best practices. So, what is a simple shift that we as leaders can make immediately to reduce pressure?

SPEAKER_01 23:18

Immediately. I would say make sure that you train yourself how to do one thing at a time. And you got to put your phone down. I'm sorry, but I gotta say it, I gotta harp on it. My kids hate it. But if you are consistently distracted, because that's what that dopamine does, is it when you're scrolling, when you're going from phone call to text message to multiple notifications to social media again, and your brain is literally and then it gets so used to being so scattered, it doesn't know how to be present.

unknown 23:51

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 23:51

So I would say the number one thing is to immediately just put your phone down, give yourself some time, right? To let yourself decompress. But there's so many things that you can implement in your life if you want to start making it a regular practice. Do some kind of gratitude and intention setting first thing in the morning with silent time, start with five minutes if you if you're not good at it, or if you're terrified of it, it's fine. And then do the same thing at night. Sit with yourself for a long uh for some alone time, let your brain decompress, and again make sure that you're limiting your phone.

SPEAKER_00 24:28

Powerful. And it's so true. You know, we live in a day in a in a in a day and age right now where there's constant movement, constant motion, constant noise. I literally was having a conversation today with another leader, and we were talking about the fatigue factor because we noticed that so many leaders are tired. And it's not just a physical body type, like a nap is not going to resolve it, it's an internal. But part of the challenge is that there's a go, go, go, go, go, go, go. Even when you're sitting down or you're supposed to be resting, the mind is still on. And uh, I love the fact you said put the phone down, right? Because we're always taking in so much that we get full, and it's hard to be able to stop, prioritize, and to ground yourself and focus when you have all of this constant motion and noise that's happening around us.

SPEAKER_01 25:23

You know what, too, when you said that, it made me think people need to be aware, but when you are multitasking, remember I said that one thing that you need to do is focus on doing one thing at a time. When you're multitasking, your brain is focused on multiple different things. It takes so much more brain power to do that than physical energy. That's why we're usually tired. So you actually have more energy if you focus on one thing at a time.

SPEAKER_00 25:49

Wow. Powerful, powerful. So I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that there are viewers and listeners that want to be able to find out more because this is a really powerful conversation. So, Dr. Campbell, what's the best way that we can continue to tap into your resources?

SPEAKER_01 26:05

Absolutely. So, people can find me on my website, drjaclincampbell.com, or they can find me on LinkedIn. Uh, we have other socials, but primarily LinkedIn is where a lot of the engagement is just because they're business professionals. And you can look me up, Dr. Jacqueline Campbell N D L P C S, and that's on LinkedIn.

SPEAKER_00 26:26

Love it, love it. So you saw the link there on the screen is also her links are in the description box. I want to invite you right now to go ahead and tap on the link. As a matter of fact, let Dr. Jackie know that you saw you heard this particular episode. Share with her what resonated with you and ask her some more questions. Questions that you'll be able to use when you have your staff meetings and you're doing some training because we believe that the community that learns together grows together. Dr. Jackie, thank you so much for joining us and for adding some serious value to our leadership community today. It's been a pleasure to have you. And I'm serious, we want you to come back again.

SPEAKER_01 27:04

I appreciate you. Thank you so much for having me.

SPEAKER_00 27:07

Absolutely. All right. Well, listen, this conversation reminded you and I that what leaders build behind the scenes determines what shows up in front of us. We were talked to today by Dr. Campbell about clarity, about prioritization, about put the phone down and be able to just be at peace and focus. And if this episode challenged your perspective, then I'm going to invite you right now to share this particular episode with another leader in your network. Matter of fact, share it with your whole team. You can use this conversation right before you dive into business in your next staff meeting. So until next time, I'm going to invite you right now to keep on leading with intention, keep on building what matters most, and continue your transformational leadership journey.